Ladies: We Need to Have Confidence in Ourselves

Chelsea Settles on MTV

I generally don't write posts directed at one particular group but, I felt the need to do this after hearing something on the radio and watching Chelsea Settles on MTV.

Ladies, we need to have confidence in ourselves. It's as simple as that. There are too many capable, beautiful, intelligent young women running around agonizing about the acne on their face, their weight, their makeup, their shoes, whether they're good enough for their man or for a man at all and even whether they are good enough for God.

Listen to me when I say it all starts with us. We have to love ourselves as we are. If there's something you don't like and you can change it, then CHANGE IT. And if there's something you can't change, ACCEPT IT. Strive towards your goals, don't just sit there mopping around being negative, thinking no one likes or loves you and that your worthless. We have to be better than that.

No one will love, have confidence in or appreciate someone who can't love, appreciate or have confidence in themselves. It's not cute and most importantly it will just continue to damage your personal worth and self-esteem. So cut it out!

Plus-Sized Salon in England

The reason why I'm even writing all this is because in England, many plus-sized women feel intimidated to get their hair done in salons because they feel like all the skinny people are looking at them with disgust. They hate all the mirrors and apparently it's just a overall horrifying experience. The only thing I thought was valid was the fact that sometimes the chairs and sinks were too small for the women.

WHATTTTTTTT?! Hold up!

Yes, let me repeat it again, ladies dread getting their hair done because of underlying insecurities. I don't know about you but when I go to my hairdresser to get my hair done, everyone regardless of size gets out of the chair feeling like a BADDDDDDDDDD *****. Period. Why? Because, you just got your hair done and you can care less what people think. I can imagine things are harder over there considering that the average size in America for a woman is a 14/16. In England, I believe it is much smaller. But, I don't think segregation between skinny and plus-sized people is the answer to anything.

Plus-Sized collection at 2010 NY Fashion Week

Skinny people and plus-sized people are not going to go away. Everyone needs to deal with they way they are or work to change/accept it. It's as simple as that. Retailers, designers, etc need to be more accommodating of everyone. And we need to love ourselves to we can work to change the industries we consume from. The sooner we begin to love ourselves, the sooner everyone else will change their attitude and begin to love us too.

We also have to be honest with ourselves, not everyone is gonna like us, or like how we look, dress, etc. AND WHO CARES?! Do you honey. You will rarely see me in heels, but regardless of what type of shoe I have on I always feel like a BADDDDDDD *****. And when I do wear heels, I still feel like the same BADDDDDD ***** that had flats on. Don't do things for other people. Do them for YOURSELF.

That girl Chelsea Settles had to figure that out on her own. I couldn't believe she was like "what if I don't lose weight? Who will love me if I leave for LA?" EXCUSE ME?! With an attitude like that, no man will be knocking down that door. I'm sorry. Don't make decisions based on other people, make decisions for you. I'm glad she made the decision to follow her heart and move to LA to pursue her dream in fashion. Now, will it be a long road for her? Yes, because the fashion industry is obsessed with size 0-4. BUT, if she's good at what she does and works on herself, she'll find her place in the industry.

In the end, ladies, love yourselves. Be confident. Do you. The rest will follow.

MB